Gifts

Turns out that giving gifts to someone in a long-distance relationship is nearly identical to giving gifts to someone in a local relationship, except it’s more work. (Effort means you care. Or it doesn’t.)

Here’s what Crowds got me for Valentine’s Day this year:

• One bottle of Strawberry Crush;
• Euclid’s Elements;
• A box which once contained chocolates;
• A note explaining that only a dumb slut would send a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day, and that she has a test on Elements on Tuesday.

I got her Google AdWords for her band (didn’t work as awesomely as I wanted, but still gave her twice as much traffic).

For her birthday I tried to get her a subscription to The Stranger (I think it failed), and I bought her (and I) one night at some fancy hotel in my city (she’s coming to visit! In five days! For three weeks!).

For my birthday she’s getting me something geeky that I already know about but have forgotten. Apparently I’ve mentioned wanting this item before.

So that’s what people in long-distance relationships give for gifts: the same thing we’d give if we lived together.

(She did watch me open the gift on my Web cam. Apparently I made a disgusted face when I found the box of chocolates, and happy-beyond-belief face when I opened it to find a book inside.)